Tag Archive for: personal development

I was recently asked to write a chapter for my good friend John Bardos’ ebook Change Your Life.

“Is there something specific that really helped put your life on a better path? Can you talk about a transformation that occurred because of one particular strategy? Is there something you do every day that is critical to your productivity?”

Rather than the typical personal development tips you hear, beyond practicing meditation and establishing a morning routine, my answer is the same one I give to people who ask how they can find more happiness in their lives. It’s incredibly simple advice, but requires great discipline to implement:

Choose Wisely

The secret to life is deceptively simple: choose carefully what you focus your attention on.

Namely, focus on the things you genuinely and deeply want more of. Look for what makes you happy.

Don’t obsess over the things that frustrate you. Don’t let anger, or resentment, become the center of attention.

Because as the saying goes, what you focus on grows. When I started to focus on cultivating an attitude of gratitude, my whole life transformed. And I find that when I consciously acknowledge the experiences, the people, and events I’m grateful and thankful for, somehow I tend to find more and more similar things that inspire gratitude.

Whereas, when I focus on my problems — when I go into emergency mode fighting fires and looking for every little detail of what is wrong with my work and family life — then I’ll find plenty of problems.

Seek, and you shall find. So seek the right things, and discipline your mind to search for opportunities rather than limitations.

I highly recommend any ambitious young person in the world today develop a regular gratitude practice as part of your daily rituals – write your answers in some kind of journal, or keep an ongoing note on your computer — but start the day with 3 things you’re thankful for, and end your day with 3 amazing things that happened for you. (If you have a hard time getting started, I recommend trying The Five Minute Journal: A Happier You in 5 Minutes a Day)

You’ll be surprised how quickly this daily practice can change your outlook, and even your circumstances.

Count your blessings, not your problems.

If you want to read 99 other great chapters from experts sharing their top strategies for reaching your highest potential, download your free copy of the book here.

Ever since I lost two of my best friends at age 20, Chris and Kareem, I’ve spent the last 14 years looking — around the god forsaken globe mind you, in every dark corner I could find — for hope.

This man helped set off a chain of events that helped me find my misplaced faith again, and take important responsibility for certain things in my life.

The process was not easy. It cost me everything I had. But I am rebuilding myself stronger than ever and with a much clearer understanding of why I’m here than ever before.

Jordan B. Peterson is a controversial professor at the center of the sociopolitical culture war erupting in the West right now who has been vilified in outrageous ways by his critics.

But I believe Peterson — of all the wildly different people I’ve encountered across four continents — I believe this man may be the most important living intellectual of our time, akin to a modern-day Joseph Campbell.

You may disagree with his views, but what the professor of psychology at the University of Toronto is doing just may tip the scales in humanity’s favor and help warring tribes and hostile brothers come to understand each other.

Right when we most need a miracle.

0:30 Introduction/Rise to Fame & Gender Pronouns
3:28 “Radical in a Conservative way”
5:54 Jung/Archetypes/Collective Unconscious
10:30 Integrating of the Logos
15:45 Bringing yourself into Alignment
19:06 Nature of Responsibility & Rights / Message for Men
22:00 Masculinity in the West
25:50 Post-Modernism
29:40 Integrating your Shadow, “You are the Locus of Evil”, Mind and Body alignment
34:50 Relation to the Raising of Children
37:50 Piaget’s developmental model and continual integration vs Freud
39:00 Speaking the Truth
41:02 On Atheism, Rationalism, Morality, Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins etc.
44:10 Intellectualism, embodiment
45:20 Motivation for true understanding

Following along with his Maps of Meaning and Personality & Its Transformations courses at the University of Toronto was a transformational process that helped me understand a lot of the deeper wisdom in the value system I was raised within. Not only that, but working through the Self Authoring program he and his academic colleagues created is also helping me create a much more accurate mental map to navigate the trials and challenges of life.

Along with the work of many others, including Joseph Campbell and Carl Jung, Peterson’s work has helped me through the most challenging times of my life, and helped me learn to navigate incredible failure, suffering, pain, and face immense terror with a newfound zen-like faith in the process.

Life is suffering.

Love is the desire to see unnecessary suffering ameliorated.

Truth is the handmaiden of love.

Dialogue is the pathway to truth.

Humility is recognition of personal insufficiency and the willingness to learn.

To learn is to die voluntarily and to be born again, in great ways and small.

So, speech must be untrammeled, so that dialogue can take place; so that we can all humbly learn, so that truth can serve love, so that suffering can be ameliorated, so that we can all stumble forward, so to speak, towards the kingdom of God.”

–Jordan Peterson

 

 

Happy New Year!

I’m still catching up from lost time with my pink eye, but I’m hustling all NYE and all weekend to make this Hero Project happen.

How was your year? Have you guys done an annual review, or set goals for the year ahead yet?

I have a very special gift for you from my good friend Tim Walther, founder of Grand Dynamics in Jackson Hole, Wyoming:

Holiday Gift: Download the 2017 Personal Mastery Guide

2017 personal mastery

Act quick and get Tim’s 2017 Personal Mastery Guide, which offers a framework for your reflection on 2016 and a new year’s resolution guide for visioning and planning for 2017. Click below to download your personal copy, FREE for Hero Project supporters (normal price is $9.95).

Click here to download (Hero Project Members Only)

Anyone motivated to be successful—to really make an impact with your life—has a list of important things they want to do. Things to have, things to be. Places they want to go, people they’d love to meet.

You may not have a list of life goals all written down on paper. You probably keep an immediate to-do list, you might have some of your long-term life goals written down on scraps of paper or word doc lists on your computer here and there, but you know at the very least you have those things somewhere in the back of your mind.

I’ve challenged myself with yearly goals in the last couple years, and I’ve mapped out plans for my businesses and different projects. I don’t frequently achieve everything on my lists, but as my friend Ramit Sethi once told me, if you’re not failing at a couple things each month, you’re not trying hard enough.

And I’ve found that sharing those goals publicly gives me additional motivation and accountability to follow through, and sometimes friends and readers can offer words of advice, help, or partnership on some goals.

I’ve had some pieces of the puzzle in the works for a long time, but I hadn’t put together a comprehensive “bucket list” of things I want to do before I die until recently. It wasn’t until Sean Ogle recently wrote about bucket lists, and how to identify the most important life goals that will enable you to achieve the other items on your list—the travel goals, the possessions, the fun stuff—that I finally got motivated to really solidify my whole life list and put it out here to share with the world.

Several friends and bloggers have compiled great bucket lists that have helped inspire some of the things I decided to put on my list. There’s a mix of places I’d love to jet set, landmarks I’d like to see, adventures I’d like to have, experiences I hope to share with specific friends and family, and of course I immediately took Sean’s advice and prioritized the importance of the enabling goals that will make everything else possible.

So without further ado, here’s my bucket list—or, 84 adventures you can follow me on here at Thrilling Heroics:

Enabling Goals

  1. Develop an online business that earns over $3000/month in passive income.
  2. Build a blog with 10,000+ subscribers.
  3. Write an ebook or launch a digital product that earns $6,000+.
  4. Publish a best-selling book.
  5. Achieve 100% freedom from all debt.
  6. Get an article published in the print edition of Esquire, GQ, Wired, Details, or Maxim magazine.
  7. Leverage my blog audience to make a major positive impact in at least 10 peoples lives (we’ve already helped my friend Ryan, and Tim & Rodrigo (two scholarship awardees at Digital Nomad Academy).
  8. Speak at South by Southwest Interactive and stick around for the music festival in Austin, Texas.
  9. Set up a Hong Kong corporation.
  10. Make at least $200K in a given year.
  11. Get a second passport, and maybe a third too.
  12. Complete my Personal MBA.
  13. Attend an official TED Conference. (Already had the honor of helping plan the locally-organized TEDxBKK!)
  14. Sell my photography and other creative artwork.
  15. Organize a lifestyle business summit (March 2014 in Costa Rica! – a 5 so far SE Asia)

Adventures to Have & Things to Do

  1. Learn to rock climb in Railay Beach, Krabi.
  2. Climb up to the mountaintop Wat Tum Sua Temple in Krabi, Thailand.
  3. Learn to sail.
  4. Climb a volcano.
  5. Eat slow-roasted crispy suckling pig in Bali (delicious babi guling).
  6. Spend a week with friends at Burning Man in the Nevada desert.
  7. Go skydiving. Go skydiving again.
  8. Learn to play guitar.
  9. Reactivate my French and achieve fluency.
  10. Learn to speak conversational Spanish. (half-way there in Colombia 2014)
  11. Get in the best shape of my life with my trainer Tom Frearson.
  12. Replace my morning coffee with Yerba Maté for at least a week.
  13. Get a tattoo with a design from my best friend.
  14. Take my dad to eat real Kobe beef at Wolfgang Puck’s restaurant CUT in Los Angeles.
  15. Spend a whole lot more time with my grandfather and learn about his life before he leaves us.
  16. Raise another dog.
  17. Take my best friend Patrick to a Daft Punk concert.
  18. Share a beer with Carlos Miceli in South America. (Sept 2013 in Santiago, Chile)
  19. Settle abroad for at least 3 months elsewhere in Asia, in Central and South America, and Europe.
  20. Live at least 3 months in San Francisco, San Diego, and Austin, Texas.
  21. Work for a month at a winery—like, in the fields, growing grapes—in California or France wine country.
  22. Drive the Pacific Coast Highway in a convertible Lamborghini.
  23. Camp under the stars on the beach and see the sun rise. (2009 in Prachuap, Thailand)
  24. Participate in the world’s biggest water fight during Thailand’s New Year’s festivities (Songkran).
  25. Do a beach photoshoot with a swimsuit model.
  26. Go to a shooting range and fire off a Kalashnikov rifle and a Desert Eagle .50 Action Express. More importantly, learn to disassemble & reassemble them.
  27. Drive a Tesla Roadster.
  28. Take a gondola along the Venice canals in Italy.
  29. Ride camel back across the Sahara desert.
  30. Take a Serengeti safari in Tanzania and Kenya.
  31. Trek through the jungle on the back of an elephant.
  32. See the view from the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris (twice).
  33. See the view from the top of Corcovado Mountain in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.
  34. Party on Ibiza for New Year’s Eve in Spain’s Ballearic Islands.
  35. Go to the Glastonbury Festival in England and see Stonehenge.
  36. Participate in the Brazilian Carnaval celebration.
  37. See what Mardi Gras and Voodoo Fest are all about in New Orleans, Louisiana.
  38. Train Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu with my son.
  39. Learn to surf (took lessons in Bali 2010). Learn to surf properly!
  40. Learn to DJ or mix electronic music.
  41. Own a Ducati motorcycle.
  42. Buy and restore a 1965 or 1966 Shelby Mustang GT350.
  43. Stay in an over-the-water bungalow in beautiful Bora Bora in the French Polynesian islands.
  44. Spontaneously walk into the airport and randomly buy a same-day ticket to wherever looks appealing.
  45. Drive the Amalfi coast near Sorrento, Italy.
  46. Rent a villa on Lake Como or Lake Lugano with friends.
  47. Own a small bar or restaurant with live music.
  48. Leave any wealth or assets I have when I go out to people who really deserve and need them.

Places to Travel & Landmarks to See

  1. The ancient temples at Angkor Wat, Cambodia
  2. The Acropolis and Parthenon in Athens, Greece
  3. The Sistine Chapel and Vatican City in Rome, Italy
  4. The pyramids at Giza, Egypt
  5. Machu Picchu in Peru
  6. The home of the Oracle at Delphi, Greece
  7. The Taj Mahal
  8. The ancient city of Petra, carved into canyon walls in southern Jordan
  9. The Karnak temple and the Valley of the Kings near Luxor, Egypt
  10. The Mayan ruins at Chichen Itza near Cancun, Mexico
  11. Iguazu Falls on the Argentina/Brazil border
  12. The Uffizi Gallery in Florence, Italy
  13. The Petronas Twin Towers in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
  14. The Banaue Rice Terraces in the Philippines
  15. The Borobudur stuppa in Java, Indonesia
  16. Gorgeous Zion National Park, Utah
  17. Niagara Falls lit up at night
  18. Potala Palace in Lhasa, Tibet
  19. Jerusalem’s Old City
  20. The Hagia Sofia mosque in Istanbul, Turkey
  21. The abbey of Mont-St-Michel in France

You’ll notice I’ve included a few things I’ve already accomplished (plus I come back to update this list every few months, so things are continually getting crossed off).

I’ve also taken Sean’s advice to have a few things that will be easier to achieve, and a few goals I can obtain in the very near future.

I think when you make your own list it’s important to recognize the big things you’ve already done that you’d always dreamed of, and include a few “gimme” goals so you can start off strong and stay motivated.

Of course I expect that my feelings about some items on the list may change throughout the course of my life. I may not achieve everything, some of my goals will change, or I may add new items to the list. But, it’s a starting point and it’s something I can always refer back to to remind me what I want to accomplish.

Of course if there’s anything you can help me achieve, or something you want to join in on, leave a shout out and we’ll talk! 

What’s on Your List?

Take a look at my in-depth breakdown of how to establish meaningful personal and professional goals for yourself in all the important realms of your life. It’s written to help you establish yearly goals, but the principles can be applied to building your own life goals list too.

If you have a bucket list already, share it. If not, take a look at the above articles and get on it! Your time here is short, so remember to value every day you have and make the most of it.

Anyone who was present for Steve Jobs’ keynote speech at this year’s Macworld conference in San Francisco (or anyone who watched online), in which he introduced the iPhone as a groundbreaking new product, knows how captivating a speaker the Apple CEO is. And anyone who saw the long lines in anticipation of the iPhone’s release date knows how effective the PR hype has been.

Communications coach Carmine Gallo recently wrote up a great critique of Jobs’ presentation, packed with some useful tips for the rest of us to improve our public speaking skills:

  1. Build Tension. A good novelist doesn’t lay out the entire plot and conclusion on the first page of the book. He builds up to it. Jobs begins his presentation by reviewing the “revolutionary” products Apple has introduced. According to Jobs, “every once in a while a revolutionary product comes along that changes everything…Apple has been fortunate to introduce a few things into the world.” Jobs continues by describing the 1984 launch of the Macintosh as an event that “changed the entire computer industry.”
  2. Stick to One Theme Per Slide. A brilliant designer once told me that effective presentation slides only have one message per slide. One slide, one key point. When Jobs introduced the “three revolutionary products” in the description above, he didn’t show one slide with three devices. When he spoke about each feature (a widescreen iPod, a mobile phone, and an Internet communicator), a slide would appear with an image of each feature.
  3. Add Pizzazz to Your Delivery. Jobs modulates his vocal delivery to build up the excitement. When he opens his presentation by describing the revolutionary products Apple created in the past, his volume is low and he speaks slowly, almost in a reverential tone. His volume continues to build until his line, “Today Apple is going to reinvent the phone.” Be an electrifying speaker by varying the speed at which you speak and by raising and lowering your voice at the appropriate times.
  4. Practice. Jobs makes presentations look effortless because he takes nothing for granted. Jobs is known to rehearse demonstrations for hours prior to launch events. I can name many high-profile chief executives who decide to wing it. It shows. It always amazes me that many business leaders spend tens of thousands of dollars on designing presentations, but next to no time actually rehearsing. I usually get the call after the speaker bombs. Don’t lose your audience. Rehearse a presentation out loud until you’ve nailed it.
  5. Be Honest and Show Enthusiasm. If you believe that your particular product or service will change the world, then say so. Have fun with the content. During the iPhone launch, Jobs uses many adjectives to describe the new product, including “remarkable,” “revolutionary,” and “cool.” He jokes that the touch-screen features of the phone “work like magic…and boy have we patented it.”

[via: Steve Jobs’ Greatest Presentation]